Basic to the understanding of the role of emotion in our lives is its speed. Emotions present themselves to our consciousness at the speed of light and often catch us unaware of their presence before we can fasten our safety belt for the ride. Any NF adult or parent of an NF child can vouch for this. It causes us to ask whether emotion’s speed is a blessing or a curse.
Emotion’s Speed Is Faster than Reason’s
The development of an emotion is faster, by far, than the processing of reason. Emotion, as we will see in more detail later, warns of danger even before our senses have completely identified the source of danger. Data from within us and from without our body reaches the amygdala (the emotional hot spot of the brain) before it reaches the cortex (which I suggest we may have mistakenly called the higher order of intelligence in the brain). Both the emotional and analytical functions of the brain, in my humble opinion, should be given the title “executive functions” because of their decision-making powers.
The speed of our emotions can prematurely force a decision if we don’t learn to slow them down by the use of reason and the process we call thinking. We want to be in control of our emotions, and thinking is one way to gain control. How often have you observed someone flare with anger at some remark and spiral out of control? How often have you seen it result in fights and the severance of relationships, all because emotion ruled their minds and they did not halt itand subjected to reason’s examination?
Our Design Provides Answers to Emotion’s Speed Problems
How fast can a person fall in love? We all know the answer to that. Emotions can be lightning fast and catch us off guard so easily that we succumb to their influences and we think later. Understanding how to catch emotions in flight and take a mental timeout to think can be our deliverance. Coping skills are helpful but are not the long-term answer. Hidden in the design of our innerkinetics are the answers we are looking for.
Emotion’s Speed Control Is Easier for the SJ than the NF
For the NF temperament, halting the powerful surge of emotion can call for a struggle that takes time and effort to win. Often, an SJ will criticize the NF for not instantly pulling out of their “funk” or their mood. The NF must process the emotions because they know from repeated experience the value and the wisdom of deep-seated emotions. Furthermore, are wired to proceed only after the emotional issues have been sorted out. The SJ, without using any particular coping skill, is suspicious of emotion, naturally cautious, and not impacted by the emotion. Nor do they even value it to the same degree. Precisely for the above reasons, it is easier to teach an SJ to question their emotions and take time out to think before they commit. However, one temperament should not criticize the other in whose shoes they have not walked.
Emotional Intelligence Is Emotion’s “Pause Button”
Emotional intelligence is not denying your emotions the right to speak. Instead, it is making them pause and enter a debate with reason, whatever it takes. Trying to eliminate these speedsters of the mind is futile. They will always out-pace the fastest thought. Whatever their task or accomplishment, they do so in a flash so fast our consciousness of them lags behind their development. As a result, a person feels depressed only after they are depressed. And a person is elated after the feeling of joy (already present) is perceived.
I have spoken as though emotions are not always right in their judgments, and that is true. However, we should also keep in mind that sometimes they will prove logic to be wrong. This is another reason to evaluate our emotions with care and not summarily dismiss them.
My hope is that this book will lead you, as its content has led many others, to be intelligently emotional. If it helps you to develop the intelligent use of your emotions and a rewarding lifestyle, my labor will not have been in vain. You can access it HERE. If you are subscribed to our weekly updates, our next issue will provide a link to purchase it with a 15% discount and free shipping.
Lean into the whole truth. Discover the truth of who YOU are — the “Real You” — and who your children truly are. Discover how to best engage your children in finding the whole truth. INNERKINETICS, Your Blueprint to Excellence and Happiness, is a great resource.
Our team at InnerKinetics is ready to provide that help, too. If you’d like some assistance, you can request a consultation. An InnerKinetics consultant will call you to answer questions and schedule your meeting. Schedule an Initial Consultation. If you are more independent and want to cut to the chase, you need not wait for a call back because you can get answers to your questions and schedule your session HERE.