Adapted from INNERKINETICTS, Your Blueprint for Excellence and Happiness, by Ray W. Lincoln
Answering “Who Am I?” Leads to Better Goals
Philosophers have pondered this deep, personal question of identity from the days of Plato and even before. “Who are we?” they have asked. And we are all asking the same question for the same reason. How can we know what is the real goal for our lives if we have no idea who we are or whether defining who we are is adequate?
Defining success for yourself means defining it from the knowledge of self from within — defining success your way. One of my clients found his true self and his goals by listening to his inner longing to bring healing and wholeness to the world. The Temperament Key confirmed his desire. Starting with the identification of this powerful drive in his temperament, he began to sculpt a goal that he would realize in stages and bring him to his highest feelings of fulfillment as he made a significant difference in healing the woes of others. He found his path.
The success for those who have discovered themselves has been remarkable, and people keep expressing happiness and relief at finding their inner design in the hidden corners of their inner being. Both finding who they are and then discovering the goal that fits this discovery is what motivates them.
This self-knowledge you will gain is accurate, too. I always hear from those I have coached, “How do you know this about me?” People are always amazed when they understand themselves and feel the relief it brings. The accuracy of the Temperament Key even surprised me early on in my practice.
As we follow this proven way of self-discovery, you will see for yourself whether it fits. I promise, I will not try to force upon you some explanation of who you are or the goal you should adopt. Rather, you must verify all conclusions for yourself, and you can do this. If you conclude that you have discovered your inner strengths after completing the InnerKinetics® Adult Temperament Key and verifying its results by reading the descriptions, read INNERKINETICS, Your Blueprint to Excellence and Happiness, where I will teach you how to release those “God-given powers” within you and follow your purpose all the way to your self-defined success. Furthermore, you will discover not only if your temperament fits, but whether your ideas of success fit, and how and why they fit.
To be the best person, parent, leader, helper, or whatever you generally desire to be, you must take this journey deep inside. As machines take over more of what we did with our hands and feet, it becomes more important to develop the strengths of our inner lives and define our goals more precisely to find success at anything. Your success (and mine) in all things lies with an inner self-understanding that leads to defining success your way.
If no drum beats relentlessly within your spirit, thumping out the passion that says, “Oh, to God that I could be successful as I define success, that I could cease to be derailed by my own weaknesses, find the power within me that drives my desires, discover and live in my own strengths, and be the best that I can be,” this journey is not for you — not yet.
Desires Can Help Define Success
However, if you are still saying, “Honestly, I don’t know who I am, and that bothers me. I need to find myself before I find my goal,” you are right. You will find yourself as you discover the real you. Then your goals will come into sharp focus and your definition of success will be further refined by your temperament’s strengths and urges.
However, for now, consult your desires, some of which are a direct result of your inner drives — your strengths. Your desires are more you than the success others want for you. You will need to know your real desires anyhow. They are one important pointer to your goals and an indicator of your true inner drives. Your InnerKinetics produce the desires that motivate you, so there is a direct cause-and-effect connection.
Begin your awareness now of what your true goal in life should be by consulting your desires, and later we will test them against the real indicator: your temperament.
No doubt you have dreamed of being successful, perhaps even daydreamed about it. Your desires as expressed in these dreams indicate something about what you define as success for you. Do you dream of rewarding relationships or being significant or creating a perfect family? Whatever your desires, ponder them and your personal definition of success — even if they seem unrealistic — and ask what it is that these dreams are telling you about your goals and the direction of your life.
Let’s Start Defining Success YOUR Way
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