Ways to Gain Control Over Unwanted Thoughts

Gain Control Over Unwanted Thoughts

Anything can come into our minds and this can happen at any time. We can’t always stop what comes into our minds (factor one) and we need to get unhelpful and unwanted thoughts out of our mind quickly (factor two). We can’t let them comfortably reside in our mind. If we do, they will be more difficult to remove.  Speed is the essence of success.  We must act immediately. Delay, and we pay for it.  Therefore, take the following steps to remove unwanted thoughts. And do this quickly.

Locate the Source and Turn It Off

Did the thoughts come from wide open sense gates:  seeing, hearing, tasting, touching or smelling?

Ask yourself: “Is it something I am seeing or hearing perhaps?” If unwanted, turn the source off immediately.  Whatever I am looking at or listening to that produced the unwanted thoughts, turn it off or look away at something else. Close down the source or excuse yourself.  Do whatever needs to be done to shut off the incoming messages from your ears/eyes.

I had a client who was addicted to porn on the internet.  Until he was willing to turn off what he was seeing, I could do little for him. Willingness to shut down the sense gate and remove yourself is an initial demand of success. The sense gates of touch and taste, for some, can also be the source of unwanted thoughts. Our senses relay their messages so fast we have little time to make a decision as to what we want and don’t want to let into our minds. Awareness of the likely sources of problems is an early step to winning over pesky thoughts and feelings.

Ask: Did they come from our inner sense gates, desires, or feelings — especially those that give us pleasure and fuel our imaginations?

Identifying the sources of undesired thoughts and feelings is where to start and dealing with them appropriately is the task of the follow through.

Perhaps they come from poor time management, such as when we have time on our hands and we try to satisfy a hungry mind. Idle moments can be the devil’s ploy or the angel’s pleasure.  Manage time assiduously.

Change Focus

The mind follows our focus. So changing focus is perhaps the oldest trick. Whatever we attend to will become the area of our minds activity. Simply changing the scenery, like going for a walk, can bring the mind back into control.

Engage Your Body to Change Focus from Unwanted Thoughts

The best way to change focus when you are locked into a pattern of undesirable thoughts is to resort to physical actions. As difficult as it is at times to change thoughts, we can always do something with our bodies that will redirect and fill our attention.  Don’t ever give up trying to change your mind without first engaging your body in some activity that is, preferably, opposite to what has entrapped your mind.

Play a Different Tune or Ponder a Different Phrase

Repeated thoughts are of particular concern. Our brains love to repeat things.  A tune or a phrase — some of them harmless — may play themselves over and over in our minds, even to the last moment when we go to sleep and, yes, even start replaying again the next day! Refocus! Play something else over in your mind.

Anything repeated becomes a habit.  And if habits are now the issue that needs to be broken, remember:  Habits are broken by developing new habits, new patterns of thinking in the mind, or simply changing to ready-at-hand interests that you have previously developed.  Or, develop a new interest. Try several possibilities and soon you will find something that grabs your interest.

If We Don’t Control Our Minds…

If your efforts fail, get help from an experienced coach. Remember, if we do not control of our minds, our minds will control us.

Next, we’ll look at two sides of our memory:  our memory and our “forgettery.”



Lean into the whole truth.  Discover the truth of who YOU are — the “Real You” — and who your children truly are.  Discover how to best engage your children in finding the whole truth.  INNERKINETICS, Your Blueprint to Excellence and Happiness, is a great resource.


It may surprise you, but your child is most probably a different temperament.  They are unique individuals too.  So even if they are the same temperament (two letters), they may be a different type (four letters).  And the strength of their drives will different from yours as well.  Your InnerKinetics (temperament) is not genetically passed on.  Therefore, it is exceedingly important to understand your child.  I’m a Keeper! is the resource you need to make that journey.

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