What’s the story with your marriage?

What's the story with your marriage?

When it comes to your marriage…what kind of story are you hoping to tell?  We all have a narrative unfolding in our most significant relationships.  Are your storylines aimed at Greek tragedy, fairytale endings, or masterpiece classics?  If your goal is a healthy relationship, let the story with your marriage be an ongoing and epic success, full of plot twisters and surprise endings.

Plot Twists and Surprise Endings

We’ve been talking about turning relationship mistakes into masterpieces instead of messes.  This process almost always reveals an interesting story.  And who wouldn’t want it to be a story that ends in success?

I think every success story should have twists and turns, heroes and villains, and some elements of surprise here and there.  How about you?  Come to think of  it, is it even possible to find a compelling story without some hint of these elements?

We’re usually advised that to set good success goals, we must begin with the end in mind.  Consider the outcomes you desire and work your way back.  This seems like a good plan. And the approach is reasonable because we are designed to propel our ourselves toward where we are focused.  The object of our intense focus is literally the vector we’ll travel as we make choices.  So it stands to reason that if you want a healthy marriage, you need to tell yourself a positive narrative.

Even so, a great story is typically full of people making mistakes, learning lessons, and finding better ways to play out the next scene.  Should the story of your marriage be any different?

What’s the story with your marriage?

  • Fairytale Fake? … with loads of denial, half-truths, and shady backstories?

Don’t waste time pretending you are someone you are not.  The Real You is the one your partner wants to know and love more.

  • Nightmare on [your street name here] Street? …where no one escapes unscathed and survivors are considered lucky?

Let mistakes you both make become momentary twists in the plot, rather than a permanent and unhappy ending to the story.

  • Or … A Classic Masterpiece? … with a rich and rewarding storyline?

We all want a marriage we can be proud of.  It starts with setting goals.  But most importantly, the outcome is determined by your response when mistakes are made with each other.  This is when the plot thickens.

Stay with us as we go on a short journey through these 3 very different types of marriage relationship stories.

And ask yourself: What kind of story am I hoping to tell?

Spoiler Alert

If you want to ‘read ahead’,  you’ll find that yet again, your healthy marriage starts and ends with understanding how you and your partner are made on the inside.  It’s these natural drives, preferences, and motivations that form the reasons you think, feel, and act the way you do.

This inner design (your InnerKinetics®) that drives you is NEVER an excuse to behave badly. But understanding its role is always the first step to resolving important conflicts.  Begin that understanding by identifying your inner design.  Then get your partner to do the same.  How are you alike?  How are you different?  The answers lie in the meanings behind the four letters you will receive when you complete the InnerKinetics® Temperament Key.

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